An elderly lady was invited to an old friends home for dinner one evening.

She was impressed by the way her lady friend preceded every request to her husband with endearing terms such as: Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc.

The couple had been married almost 70 years and, clearly, they were still very much in love.

While the husband was in the living room, her lady friend leaned over to her hostess to say, ‘I think it’s wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your husband all those loving names’.

The elderly lady hung her head. ‘I have to tell you the truth,’ she said, his name slipped my mind about 10 years ago, and I’m scared to death to ask the cranky old asshole what his name is.’

1. Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind.

2. You can’t change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying over the future.

3. Love ……and you shall be loved.

4. God always gives His best to those who leave the choice with Him.

5. All people smile in the same language.

6. A hug is a great gift…one size fits all. It can be given for any occasion and it’s easy to exchange.

7. Everyone needs to be loved…especially when they do not deserve it.

8. The real measure of a man’s wealth is what he has invested in eternity.

9. Laughter is God’s sunshine.

10. Everything has beauty but not everyone sees it.

This story courtesy of http://www.homeholidaysfamilyandfun.com

You don’t even have to be a mother to enjoy this one….

Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During the course of the meal, Brian’s mother couldn’t help but notice how beautiful Brian’s roommate, Jennifer, was. Brian’s Mom had long been suspicious of the platonic relationship between Brian and Jennifer, and this had only made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Brian and Jennifer than met the eye.

Reading his mom’s thoughts, Brian volunteered, ‘I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you Jennifer and I are just roommates.’

About a week later, Jennifer came to Brian saying, ‘Ever since your mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don’t suppose she took it, do you?’

Brian said, ‘Well, I doubt it, but I’ll send her an e-mail just to be sure. So he sat down and wrote:

Dear Mom,

I’m not saying that you ‘did’ take the gravy ladle from the house, I’m not saying that you ‘did not’ take the gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

Love, Brian

Several days later, Brian received an email back from his mother that read:

Dear Son,

I’m not saying that you ‘do’ sleep with Jennifer, I’m not saying that you ‘do not’ sleep with Jennifer. But the fact remains that if Jennifer is sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now.

Love, Mom

LESSON OF THE DAY – NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER

Author Unknown